A ghost, I slither through her entourage,
slide fingers into the seams telescopic eyes unveiled–
tabooed truth among the moles and mimes–and pull:
black shirt ironed with logos of pop punk bands
slip off her shoulders; faded jeans pressed
with handprints of former friends fall, followed
by panties and bra–bare but for her Vans.
Mesmerized by the scenic mountains for millennia,
drawn to the depths of crevices I dreamt to explore
since the day we first met at the church’s cafe,
but still I search for more seams to unstring–
a loose thread dangles from her tongue’s sheathed edge.
Persistence powered by pain pulls until even the flesh
I fantasized about fucking falls to the dirt–beneath
the silk is found neither bone nor muscle nor heart
nor brain–only darkness unnoticed those midnights
I followed her into alleys after worship, but now I see
in the bright hangover light her contours conform
to the bottom of the soles of the boys she follows–
everywhere. Now I see why she spoke so highly
of animal rights when I was her best friend.
Shadow
April 18, 2010Tears
April 18, 2010Shut slits drip drops–
the streams stain the flushed face
in whitewashed trails across the expanse
beneath the quaking horizon,
but not one drop drips
into the serpent’s plate–
each drizzles into hands drawn
toward infinitely toward infancy–
dabbled in novelties that ferment
into renovated firmaments–
oblivion’s face debased
as the prince commences the crusade.
Even vinegar sweetens deserted
palates–the density sobers inebriated
stations, cracks the core of Calvary,
resurrects crucified love renewed:
I am reborn.
Flagellation
April 18, 2010The thief wakes me from the dream I fell in–
the nightmare frightens away my inhibitions–
I crawl through thorny gardens–they puncture
the box that imprisons my spirit–torrents
flood the desert I strayed into–stranded
on a lie by a girl I once loved and still require
for life–and pour into plains with a tempest
that quakes the stillborn world. The Sea reborn
on midnight as the dawn approaches.
The drought ends when the rain begins.
Fuck the Grammar Police
March 15, 2010As I read Emily Dickinson’s poetry today, I came across a term I recognized but did not understand: Anno Domini. I checked the dictionary, discovered that it was the full form of AD, and learned something about AD’s usage: AD “should be placed before the numerals, as in AD 375.” My first thought was to travel across the blogosphere, look for blog entries with the incorrect usage, and post rude comments about how terrible their grammar is. While correcting the blogger’s bad grammar, my own comments would misuse ellipses, because that’s a trademark of pedantic pricks. Their other trademark is to contribute nothing to the discussion (or to life).
Maybe I’m too harsh on these pricks; most of them are only teenagers. I know I was completely anal about grammatical rules when I was younger. Eventually, I learned two facts that have made me more tolerant of “bad” grammar: 1) many rules, such as the rule not to split infinitives, are idiotic and not even considered canon by the gods of English, whomever they be; 2) the most badass writers do not always play by the rules. Nowadays, what matters most to me is that what I write be articulate; formalities are vain and often result in tinny, mechanical, lifeless prose.
Then again, when I was a perfectionist, I never did try to condescendingly correct somebody else’s prose, and if I were to, I would have made sure my own was primped and proper. The self-proclaimed grammar police do not worry about practicing what they preach because they do what they do for only two reasons: 1) because they’re bored and are too slothful to do anything more productive, and 2) because they need to bruise other egos to heighten their own, which sorely needs boosts to compensate for their miserable unproductive lives. They are not writers; they are trolls. Fuck them all!
First Thoughts on Final Fantasy XIII
March 13, 2010After watching this chill video of a lovely violinist playing “Decisive Battle” from Final Fantasy VI, I developed the urge to buy the latest of the series, Final Fantasy XIII. I’ve played most of the series but haven’t finished any of them since 7, so spending $95 for the game and the “Collector’s Edition” guide is risky, especially now that I rarely play videogames, but what is life without risks? Thus, I bought the damn game.
I’ve only played it for four hours, so there is still much I have yet to experience–I just gained the ability to perform magic right before I stopped–but so far, I like it. The game begins quickly; I prefer games to start this way and not with outdrawn introductions. Exposition is sprinkled throughout the story rather than dumped on you at the beginning, so all I knew for the first couple hours was that rebels were at war with an empire; in other words, it’s the same story as every other Final Fantasy game. Many of the characters also look awfully similar to ones in previous games. I don’t mind.
Most of my time with the game today was spent watching dialog; it felt more like a movie than a game. I should expect this though since it is the beginning of the game; RPGs also are inherently full of dialog. Fortunately, I’m near the point where there is more gameplay and less dialog.
I never played FF12, and it’s been years since I played FF10, but this one is much different from what I’m used to. It’s much more streamlined in character customization and development. I assume this will result in less of a grind and more of a focus on the actual story, so I don’t mind it at all. Likewise, there is not much dialog to be had with random NPCs; they do make comments as my character passes, but none of them are worth listening to. Then again, have NPCs ever said anything meaningful in any RPG?
If what I read is accurate, there are also no towns or overworld to explore. It’s definitely not an old-school RPG; I understand why some fans of the series might not enjoy this one. As for me, as long as it offers a compelling story, memorable characters, beautiful music, and enough gameplay to keep me playing, then I’ll like it.
My only problem with the game is with the voices. Vanille has a terribly annoying voice; it’s the typical girly voice one would find in an anime! I expected more from Square Enix.
It’ll probably take me weeks to finish the game, so I won’t be able to say whether it was wonderful or disappointing for awhile, but I enjoy it so far. If I actually finish it, maybe I’ll return to the ones I haven’t and have a go at them again.
The Legendary iPhone Killer
February 22, 2010Ever since the iPhone hit the world in June 2007, envious nerd virgins everywhere gnashed their teeth and burnt with rage, offended that Apple made technology accessible to everybody. Since then, they have prophesied that a greater smartphone would be manufactured by a superior competitor with the ultimate features: replaceable battery, FM transmitter, Linux, expandable SD storage slot, hardware keyboard, and other unnecessary bullshit nobody actually cares about. They deemed this messianic phone of theirs the legendary iPhone killer.
The first legendary iPhone killer was the Blackberry Storm. It removed what made Blackberries great and slapped on a touchscreen. Needless to say, it failed to kill the iPhone. Months later came the G1, powered by Google’s Android, the ultimate mobile OS. Despite having an OS that was “open source,” it also failed to kill the iPhone. After that dud came the Palm Pre. It too failed to kill the iPhone.
After so many failed legendary iPhone killers, nerd virgins realized why these failures failed so miserably: they were not laden with enough gaudy features. Hence the creation of the Droid, which truly would be known as the ultimate and most legendary iPhone killer. Droid did everything that iPhone didn’t: mediocre hardware keyboard, replaceable battery with a flimsy cover, multitasking guaranteed to crash the phone, misogynistic marketing that made nerd virgins feel like real men, and a name ripped off from Star Wars. “The Droid shall crush American capitalist swine!” nerd virgins everywhere chanted in their user groups. Even Apple nerds–not to be confused with nerd virgins–speculated that the Droid might be a formidable foe to the iPhone. It was quite a powerful phone. How could it fail?
A few months later, everybody forgot about the Droid and turned their attention to the Nexus One, which was created by Google. Nergins everywhere jizzed their pants as they prepared for the day that the iPhone would surely die. The Nexus One was released in January. Has Google even sold 100,000 units yet?
Dozens of legendary iPhone killers have come and have been quickly forgotten; a dozen more will follow before the end of the year. However, even after three years, there is still only one iPhone.
Screw Google
February 19, 2010I must clarify something: I don’t hate Google or its fanboys, the assdroids, because Google competes with Apple; if that were the case, then I’d have as much disdain for Nokia, HP, etc. I hate Google’s self-righteousness and the assdroid’s blind obedience to the company. When a company makes its motto “Do no evil,” it is announcing to the world that it will be more ethical than the average company, yet it increasingly behaves in ways that would make the Microsoft of the nineties blush: it attempts to build an online library without bothering to ask for permission from the rightful owners of the content from which it hopes to profit, and it has shown extreme willingness to disregard the privacy of its users as evidenced by the Buzz fiasco. What’s the typical assdroid response? They parrot the words their overlord, Eric Schmidt: “If you have something that you don’t want anyone to know, maybe you shouldn’t be doing it in the first place.” That’s bullshit when it comes from the government and that’s bullshit when it comes from the “do no evil” company. I honestly can’t believe that there are people–nerds, of all people–who would treat privacy as something only terrorists and criminals desire.
To them, Google preaches about openness all the time, so it must be a very ethical company even if it is only open when it serves their bottom line; has Google even released the source code to Gmail? Indeed, Apple is also only open when such openness is beneficial to its business, but that’s the difference between Apple fanboys and Google fanboys: Apple fanboys are intelligent enough to know that Apple is not a company of saints; most would even admit that Steve Jobs, though a genius, does not have the most likable personality. We know Apple is good to us not because it is an altruistic company, but because it is good business sense not to treat one’s customers like ass. That’s that difference between Apple fanboys and assdroids: we love Apple not because it is preachy, but because it makes excellent products of impeccable build that every company, including Google, shamelessly imitates.
Google might not be more “evil” than any other company, but considering the self-righteousness and hubris inbred in the company, it is certainly much more annoying than any other company. Google and its fanboys are of the same ilk as televangelists: they are preachy hypocrites who would never allow what they preach to stand in the way of profit.
Where are we supposed to find porn now?
February 19, 2010Apple has just dealt a low blow to nerd virgins everywhere: the “draconian” company will no longer allow overtly sexual content in its App Store. As usual, these self-proclaimed freedom fighters are calling Apple Big Brother, Steve Jobs Hitler, and Phil Schiller the antichrist. Among their grievances is a desperate teary-eyed plea: “Where will we find our porn now?”
One would think that these manchildren who spend their lives on computers would have figured out that pornography and sexual content can be found anywhere on the Internet quite easily–and often unintentionally–which is why I feel little sympathy toward them or toward the developers of these apps that are nothing more than collections of free pictures taken from the Internet. It’s completely understandable why Apple would not want to be associated with such tackiness.
The reply by nergins is that by not offering customers the choice for such apps and forcing them to rely on all the dozens of other methods of downloading pictures of scantily clad models, Apple is violating our freedom of speech and worse than Nazi Germany. Most people realize that the First Amendment applies only to the government, which Apple is not. Apple is a business and the iPhone is a platform like Nintendo’s Wii, Microsoft’s Xbox 360, or Sony’s Playstation 3; all of these companies decide what is allowed on their consoles.
If you really want pornography on your phone, then use Safari. If you cannot get off on pornography that isn’t in the form of a native app, then jailbreak your phone. If a native pornographic app that is not from the official App Store is unable to arouse you, then you have issues that only a psychiatrist can treat.
It’s all right to be disappointed with Apple’s decisions, but it’s insane to believe they are obligated in any way–especially by the Constitution–to serve you apps to get you off. If this decision of theirs is unwise as they say–and have said about every single business decision Apple has ever made–then they will suffer in the market. I have a feeling though that most people who downloaded these junk apps will easily content themselves with the pictures and videos of naked women that exist EVERYWHERE ELSE.
Lasagna!
February 15, 2010Like Garfield I love sleep and lasagna. Just tried a vegan lasagna recipe today. Was skeptical of how it’d turn out– there is no vegan substitute for cheese that isn’t total ass–but damn, it was delicious! Next time, I’ll make it with more layers; the recipe’s quantities only suffice for two layers, which leaves it rather flat. I’ll also add meatless ground beef.
Now, will I ever be able to find a decent vegan enchilada recipe? I’d be satisfied with one that tasted like those expensive pre-packaged ones in the organic foods section!
Silvermist’s Sonnet to Tinker Bell
February 15, 2010The Ocean quakes whenever you fly near
me as though Spring arrived early and never
will leave. You can ferment the tide and tear
the Hollow’s fabric with little endeavor.
Fresh leaves cannot outshine the glitter of
your dress. The Sky covets the blue of your
eyes, and the Sea quivers to rise above
the shore, embrace you, and ride the downpour.
Must fairies follow traditions that doom
us lives apart? What use are wings if they
cannot fly me over walls, beyond flumes
to the grove where you stay, my clever fay?
No bubble can presume us apart for Spring
arrived–when you came–I received new wings.
